Author Archives: Kristin Nicole

About Kristin Nicole

Kristin Nicole was born and raised in Miami, Florida. At 15 her family moved to Frisco, Texas for a year due to her father's job, and shortly was transferred back to Miami. Her love for dance and writing grew, but her love for writing continued through out the years. At 21 she moved to San Diego, California where she lived for two years only to make her way back home. Education was a struggle but she managed to work her way back, working full time and going to school on-line. In 2010 she reached her goal and first one in the family to get her Associates in Science for Psychology, her love of learning the human mind and everything about life has continued through her studies at Grand Canyon University, where she will get her Bachelors in Science for Psychology in June 2012. Although her passion for psychology is strong, her love for writing has taken her to new beginnings, where she will pursue her love into a Masters in Journalism. Every day she works hard to reach the goals of one day being a Great writer and editor. Each day is a step closer to her dreams coming true. A note from Kristin Nicole: I love to write, whether it’s poetry, small stories, or just about every day life. Writing down what I feel takes away all the concerns and all the stuff you don’t know how to say in person. To me it just comes naturally to write what I am feeling or thinking. I want this website to become a place people can turn to with questions, ideas, and everyday thoughts. If you have any questions, anything to say or have any updates please email me at soapnights@gmail.com All questions are private, I will not post any personal information such as emails or name. If you do not want me to post your question on my site at all you can email me and I will let you know what I think via-email. I love to hear your thoughts, so don't be scared to share them in the comments box. xo, kristin nicole

How do I express myself?

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Express yourself. image by: google.com/images

Expressing yourself can sometimes be hard. If you are angry do you tell the person you are fighting with what you feel right then and there? Or should you wait until you cool off and have a more focused mind set? Sometimes letting it out in the moment allows you to really tell the person how you feel but sometimes it’s better to cool off and talk calmly with each other in order to avoid words you may regret later.

Sometimes there comes a time when you argue with your boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife, or friend, and sometimes you get so angry you can’t express your feelings. In my case I try to talk in the moment but if I get too frustrated I close myself off because I can’t fathom having a conversation with that person. When I try to say what I am thinking sometimes I over think my thoughts and I end up stoping my self, leaving myself with no words to say.

Why do we do this? Why is it so hard for women and men to say what they feel? Are we afraid of what the other person might say? SOMETIMES, For me that is the case. I’m afraid to get into a bigger argument when I just want them to understand what I am feeling, but that doesn’t always work.

So I find it easier to express myself sometimes through email, letters or text. I know this shouldn’t be the solution but sometimes it’s the only way to get what I feel out in the open. It’s better to get it out one way than not at all. Right?!?

In my letter I try to really go into details on what I feel but you still want to make sure you aren’t crossing the line somewhere. Sometimes in letters the person reading it may interpret your words differently and you don’t want to hurt the person’s feelings, unless taht is your intentions of course.

I found a website that talks about relationships and communication, and I truly believe that communication is the KEY to a healthy and long relationship. You can’t hold things inside because in the end you will only blow up, and that isn’t good for either one of you. This website tries to help MEN communicate better. For those men who have problems communicating check this website out and click HERE.

Even though the website indicates how to communicate more for men towards women, I think it’s good for women to read it as well. Some of women might be a little more like men then we think. Open up to your other half and tell them how you feel, but don’t attack them with your words, just tell them that you only want them to know how you are feeling and what can “we” do to fix it.

Assumptions are the termites of relationships. ~Henry Winkler.

xo
kristin nicole

30 Goals Before 30

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Update 12/05/12:

I have sadly not done much of the goals on my list. Unfortunately some take time and money and I have neither. I have accomplished a lot reaching my 30s. I have 15 days left in my 20s and I am very sad to see them go. My 20s have been filled with lots of emotions. I grew up a lot, I’ve learned life lessons, I have continued my education and I have found a best friend who I want to spend the rest of my life with. I’m not going to lie, turning 30 is a little scary. I always heard the older you get the faster life passes you by. I am truly starting to see that now. I am seeing that every moment counts, that we shouldn’t take things for granted and we need to express to those we love that we love them. I have encountered freedom, moving away from home thousands of miles away with no family but a true friend who till this day is my family. Yoli – You are my best friend and my sister, without you I would have not been able to survive Cali, and I will continue to love you and cherish you in my life. I miss you every day I don’t get to see you, and although we don’t always talk, you are always in my thoughts. With Yoli I gained a family. I gained three beautiful nephews that I adore. They are young men now and I love them dearly.

After moving back from Cali I experienced a life lesson some should never have to go through. Lost love and financial hardship. I pulled through and survived both. My families support helped me surpass what I thought at the time was one of the hardest things I had to go through. Then I found my best friend. My boyfriend has been there with me and has supported me going through school and finishing my Associates, Bachelors and now my Masters Degree. Although I didn’t get to finish my degree before reaching 30 I will be done by the end of next year, and this is an achievement to be very proud of.

I am now entering what they call “the prime” and although I rather stay in my 20s it’s looking like I don’t have a choice. For my 30th my boyfriend is taking me to San Francisco, California. I am excited to spend my birthday over there and see another one of my best friends. I have lost friends and gained friends, and although I have gone through struggles, I would not change one thing. Every hardship, every tear, every laughter and smile has made me into who I am today.

Let’s hope 30s are even better than my 20s. Let’s see what it has in store for me…..

xo
kristin nicole

Update 07/31/12:

Sadly I have not done the ones that mean the most on this list. I have crossed out the ones that I have accomplished, and I feel I should change a few things on here…. Thoughts in process….


Update: June 2011

I have recently purchased a home with my boyfriend so I can now cross out a few things on my list before 30. The ones in bold were ones I had already done when I made the list and the ones with the line through them are the current goals I’ve achieved. What are your goals?

xo,
kristin nicole

30 Goals Before 30

30 Goals Before 30… Let’s just say I don’t have that much time, yet I’m willing to try and get 30 Goals done before I’m 30! I got the idea of writing out my 30 goals before 30 from a good friend of mine. As I was reading her blog on Clothes, I discovered another post she wrote about called “30 Goals Before 30″. I thought to myself… WOW What a great idea. So of course I asked Vanessa if I can borrow her idea and make my own 30 Goals Before 30 and she was more than thrilled to see what my goals are. If you want to check out Vanessa’s Goals you can visit her website Vanessa-Michelle.com.

So where do I begin…The goals highlighted in Bold are the Goals I’ve already reached and all the rest are goals I hope to achieve before I’m 30.

Goals

1. Go sky diving <– I would still love to do this… so maybe this will be a goal to do in my 30s…
2. Travel to one new State each year (So far so good)
3. Get a pet
4. Go to the Regatta (Lost that one, when we couldn’t make it)
5. Live in Downtown Miami
6. Buy a House with my Boyfriend
7. Get my AA
8. Picture Blog (365 Picture Project) – I better get started — EEK Not going to happen…
9. Sign up for a Professional Cooking Class
10. See a Vineyard (Napa Valley)
11. See SNOW
12. Learn to play the guitar <— This is my goal for sure….
13. Learn to play the keyboard <— we shall see
14. Visit San Francisco
15. Graduate with my Bachelors Degree
16. Make a dessert from scratch
17. Make my own recipe meal
18. Help give good advice to someone who needs it. (I would think I did this one.)
19. Go to Disney World (I’ve been to Islands of Adventure with my boyfriend but not Disney World). Does Hollywood Studios Count??? We should be going to Magic Kingdom before 30 though… heh – Whoot whoot, this was achieved. We just went for our anniversary :)
20. Go to New York and finish seeing all the things I missed the first trip. (I could have done this, but decided on Chicago instead)
21. Visit Seattle
22. Visit my friend in Louisiana
23. Go in a Limo
24. Be a Maid of Honor
25. Have a mango tree in my backyard
26. Grow my own vegetable garden (Eventually but don’t think it will happen before 30 – although my boyfriend and I did have a basil tree grow) <— working on it…
27. Design my own house (Not exactly the house but a lot inside)
28. Finish the transition from Soapnights to KristinNicole.com <– Okay this is not my fault, this is my bff’s fault.
29. Write a Book (in the works) – Not going to happen before 30…..
30. Someone to discover me and have my own column so that I can work from home and travel.<– working on it.

These are my 30 Goals Before 30 – Some of them I have already achieved and some I am currently working on. You never know where life will take you but you can make choices in life that can lead you to where you want to be. Be positive and good things will always come your way.

xo,
kristin nicole

You’re NOT the one (Her thoughts)

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This is an old poem (Repost). Enjoy

PART 2 – You’re NOT the One (Her thoughts)……

You thought you stopped loving me?
You thought you didn’t care?
How could you be so selfish to just sit back and stare?
I looked into your eyes as my eyes filled up with tears,
You stood there standing watching me drown out my fears.

You pretended to be happy.
You put on an act,
You thought I couldn’t see the truth,
You had to face the facts.

You put up a wall; you pushed me to the floor
I did all I could do
I even gave you my door.
Then one day I woke up and realized this is it.
I didn’t want to be with you, my fate was sealed with out your kiss.

CHORUS:
Now you’re the one crying inside
You’re the one that can’t let go
You’re the one wishing for me to come back
Wishing once again I’d be at your door.

You pushed me way to far.
I walked right out the door.
I told you I loved you but I couldn’t take the pain no more.
I asked you if you loved me.
I gave you one last chance.
All you did was look at me, you failed my last request.

With silence in your eyes, you stood in disbelief.
You didn’t say a single word, you didn’t share a peep.
If you would have listened closely,
You can hear my every word,
You can hear the tears fall down
And my heart break in a million burns.

You didn’t think I’d leave you,
You thought I’d always be around
You thought you had me.
You stood your ground.

Well you thought wrong…
You let me walk away
You lost me that day.
Now you’re left with nothing to say.

CHORUS x 2

xo,
kristin nicole

© written by: kristin nicole

His thoughts (You’re the one)

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(Re-post)

His thoughts (You’re the one) Part 1:

I thought I stopped loving you and I thought I didn’t care.
I pushed our love aside, as you looked into my eyes.
You cried for me and I let you down.
I don’t know how to fix this so I almost let you drown.

I pretended to be happy
But you knew the real me
You knew how to make me smile and I let you leave.

You were my everything and I let you down.
I let you walk away that day,
What the fuck was I thinking when I let you get away?
Why did I put up this wall?
Why did I let you go?

Chorus: I’m crying inside
I can’t break free
Sadness is killing me
Please come back to me.
I can’t let you go
You’re my everything.

I pushed you away until you stepped out the door.
You said you loved me but you couldn’t take the pain no more.
You asked me if I loved you
If we could make it work,
You said all there was to say
Then you walked away…

I stood in silence as you looked into my eyes
I couldn’t say a word, as tears rolled down your eyes…..
I saw I was breaking your heart.
But I stood in disbelief
Never thought you would really leave me!

I can’t lose you now
You’re all I ever had
I thought I’d never lose you but I was wrong to think I had
Because I still had you,
You were mine in every way
And when I let you walk away
I lost you that day!
Now I’m left with nothing to say….

CHORUS x 2

I can’t let you go
You’re my everything….

xo,
kristin nicole

© written by: kristin nicole

Next Post you can read Part II – Her side….

How can you break free from porn?

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This is an older post (2010)


The Question:

I am just out of a very painful break up as of a couple of months ago and I am finding myself looking at porn more and more and it is just coming out from the pain I’m in and it makes me feel terrible. Anybody been in similar situations?

My Response:

Dear Addicted;

Your a young, healthy young guy, don’t feel bad about watching porn. If you feel you are addicted to it and having to watch it more then a couple times a day, then there might be a problem; find professional help (there is such a thing as porn addicts). If you just enjoy it every once in a while to be with yourself, then enjoy it and don’t feel so bad about it. It’s natural for men to like porn and get turned on by it, there is nothing wrong with this. If you feel you are just watching it to avoid getting out there again then stop; there is nothing like a real women vs. just watching porn. Stop feeling down, and get back out there, date a few women and stop feeling bad that your relationship didn’t work out. Relationships sometimes don’t work out and the only thing we can do is get back out there.

xo
kristin nicole

I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

Somebody hurt me…(Unfinished)

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This poem below really is a bit of everything. I added a dream I had in there along with my Uncle passing away, so maybe it doesn’t make sense, does it have to? I haven’t really finished it either. It feels incomplete to me. But I just can’t seem to find my muse and finish it up. Maybe someone can give me some pointers or some ideas…..Well tell me what you think….

Somebody hurt me…

Somebody hurt me
It happened so fast,
When I woke up it was in my past.
My image was blurred
Gone from my life,
Everything in that moment
Disappeared with the light.
Why do we block things from our minds that we just can’t fight?

Everybody leaves
No body ever stays
Did I do something wrong, to make them all go away?

I saw her in my dreams
So beautiful and sweet
I tried to save her but my body became weak.

I tried to speak but no words came out.
I woke up and wished for another night,
Maybe this time I can make things right.

Everybody leaves
Nobody ever stays
Did I do something wrong to make them all go away?

I wake up with tears dripping from my eyes
My heart aches with every tick from the clock
Another moment as passed, another day trashed.
With every breath I take my visions crashed.

With every pitter patter my heart skips a beat
With every tear drop, it bleeds.
With every rain drop
Horizons on its bend
Who would have seen his fate; completely dead?

xo,
kristin nicole

© Written By: kristin nicole – 2009

Dream Big

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Dream Big

Dream Big

Some people dream big, they go for what they want and they don’t stop until they get there, others dream and are disappointed by life’s outcomes and they give up hope that any dream will ever come true. If we give up on our dreams, what do we have left? Dreaming can only give us hope, hope that one day we will grow up to be what we have dreamed of since we were little, or just hope that one day we will be where we want to be when we figure out where “this dream” really is… I can’t say I have wanted to be a writer since I was little, I really didn’t start writing until I was about 15 years old. I remember sitting on my recliner at home one day and just being inspired to write a poem. Once I started writing, I couldn’t stop. Even then, I didn’t really think about becoming a writer/editor of any sort, I wrote because I loved it, I never thought in a million years it would be something I would want to do for the rest of my life, not only because it inspires me but because when I write, it’s the one thing that makes me want more.

So I’m not exactly where I would want to be in my life right now, and no I don’t get paid for writing (at least not yet), but I do it and in some form it brings me satisfaction, knowing someone out there is reading this right now, knowing that in some ways I may have helped someone with my writing, and knowing that one day this will be my full time job (although I wouldn’t see it as a job, more of a blessing). I know what it feels like to feel like nothing is going right in life, and I know how it feels like when that door finally opens and you can see a little bit of hope peaking out, not knowing where it is going to lead, but knowing that wherever you are going is going to be where you’re supposed to be. I’m not saying dreaming is easy, life gives a lot of disappointments, but with disappointments comes strength and with strength comes the faith that dreaming big, is what will lead us to where we want to be.

Don’t ever stop dreaming big, when we stop dreaming, we stop hoping, and when we stop hoping nothing is left but a little black hole, open your dreams to a new beginning and have faith that one day all our hard work will lead us to a new beginning, a beginning to where dreams come true…
xo,
kristin nicole

An Easy way to keeping your house clean

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That's Me... Cleaning House

An Easy way to keeping your house clean

Who loves chores around the house? Because I certainly don’t, but the house needs to be clean and someone’s got to do it. I opted for a maid but my wallet said no, so I have to get into gear and clean the house every week. There are different ways for everyone to keep their house clean, you just have to find the right routine that fits your schedule.

Some people spread out their cleaning duties throughout the week.
Monday: Clean your room and furniture
Tuesday: Clean the office/other rooms and furniture
Wednesday: Clean the kitchen
Thursday: Clean the bathrooms
Friday: Clean the floors
Saturday: Laundry
Sunday: RELAX

Some people say this works, you don’t have to do it all in one day and you spread it out, making time in between all the other stuff we have to do.

I on the other hand only spread out my cleaning schedule about 2 days.
Thursday is my cleaning day, I’ve been doing this since I was little, my mom would always want the house cleaned before the weekend, that way you can enjoy your weekend without having to worry to clean or do laundry.
So Thursday, I clean the entire house after work from head to toe, I make sure that whatever I’m making for dinner Thursday nights is an easy and fast dinner. That way I don’t have to worry about still having to cook after being exhausted from cleaning the house. I start with separating my laundry and I throw the first load in, then I start with the furniture in all the rooms and then I spray the bathroom and leave it to soak, after that I prepare dinner, (don’t want to clean the kitchen before cooking), in between dinner being cooked, I clean the bathrooms and continue with the laundry. After dinner is made, I clean the kitchen (minus the pots and dishes until after serving) and I clean the floors. Once dinner is ready, the house is clean and we are ready to enjoy our dinner. If I am not able to finish laundry Thursday night, I’ll try to finish laundry Friday or Saturday morning. My weekends are free and so is the rest of my week. I do it this way for a few reasons. One – I go to school on-line, work full time, and make dinner every night, I am already tired and having to clean one room a day is exhausting by just thinking about it. Thursdays are my cleaning days, I put the music on and clean away and by the weekend my house is clean, and I feel like I can relax. Having a clean house and uncluttered mess leads to a happier life.

xo,
kristin nicole

Don’t EVER Give Up….. Live your Dream

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Don’t allow yourself to Break…. Do something about it…..

When someone you love is breaking and there isn’t anything you can do about it, it leaves you feeling helpless and useless. It breaks even your heart just to see them breaking. Sometimes I wish I could tell this person to wake up and smell the roses, life is too short to be miserable all the time, why are you choosing to live this way? But are they choosing to live this way? Is it a choice to be blinded by life and the changes we can’t determine in life’s path? When we hold hope to something important to us it sometimes blinds us from the truth. I’ve always said, ’the mind blinds what the heart doesn’t want to feel.’ Or does the heart blind us from what we don’t want to see. As much as we try to protect our hearts, we cannot fight the inevitable. What is meant to be is meant to be, and no matter how many wrong turns we make, you’ll end up just where you are supposed to be. We don’t see why things happen in the moments but we later discover that we had to go through them to be where we are today, to be who we are today. Everyone has regrets, it’s up to us to hold on to them or let them go, because we can’t turn back the clocks, we can’t change time and we can’t change the decisions we have made. The only thing we can do is learn from them, hope that things will get better, that deep down in the hearts of all desires our wishes, our hopes and our dreams will in fact one day come true. If we stay buried in the hopes of all things impossible you will lead a sad life. We have to lift ourselves up, find deep down what it is that will truly make us happy, and go for it. I’m not saying you won’t fail; sometimes we have to fail a few times in order to get to where we want to be. I know I’ve failed more than a few times at more than a few things. I get up and I keep pushing forward. I only hope that whoever is listening right now does the same…. Don’t let the fears of moving forward hold you down, if we don’t try to be happy, if we don’t try to do what we want in life, then we only have ourselves to blame for the sadness and tribulations we keep living over and over again. Because when life gives you lemons, you don’t just throw them away, you make lemonade. For me…. I MAKE A VODKA TONIC

Live life to the fullest, don’t ever let anyone tell you that you CAN’T succeed and don’t ever lose faith in yourself. If you are scared of being alone, remember that no one is every alone unless they choose to be alone, and life is too short to live not knowing what you want in life, to live unhappy and unsure of yourself, because at the end of the day all we have in life are the few moments that make us look back and smile, the moments in life where you say…. I loved that day, that moment, that minute, that second of my life and today I can truly say that with all the hard times, with all the tribulations I have come across in my life, I am still pushing forward, I am still trying to discover things about myself and I am still dreaming my dreams, and one day…. I’ll be LIVING THEM.

xo,
kristin nicole

St. Patrick’s Day 2012 – Ideas on what to do

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St. Patrick’s 2012

Any plans for St. Patty this year? Each year people get together, they go to the Pub, and they drink green beer and have fun. Corned beef hash, shepherd’s pie, cabbage and Irish beer are essentials for any authentic Irish party. Plan on staying home and having a party, you can make any of those dishes. I personally do not go out and make an authentic Irish meal, but I have thought about what I can make to at least have the color green it. I was ordered from our group’s director to bring scalloped potatoes…. Any way I can make that look IRISH? LOL
In any event, wearing green is the key essential, and since we might be going in the pool, I’ll have to have a green towel or a green cover up for my bathing suit, if you are reading and you don’t live in Miami, well it’s practically summer here already so bathing suites are in. If you plan on going out there will be an early party at Fred B. Harnett Park in Coral Gables featuring Irish food, musical entertainment, craft vendors, kids activities and a full-service bar, Let the Irish Festival BEGIN! Party later on in the night at John Martin’s on Miracle Mile in the Gables which is always a hot spot, they usually start around 4pm to midnight on Salzedo Street with live music and in the meantime you can have traditional Irish food starting at 11:30AM in the restaurant. There are also other Irish pubs you can get to, there is Playwright Irish Pub & Restaurant which is located in Miami Beach, Finnegans on Ocean Drive, Fado Irish Pub in Mary Brickell Village and much more. You can search for different pubs in your area on Yelp.com – One of my favorite places to look up ratings and close by vicinities. You can do this in any area you are in.

I would love to hear what festivities are going on in your area…..
Happy St. Patrick’s everyone….
xo,
kristin nicole