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Tomorrow is never Promised…..

Thursday I woke up and I went to a funeral, a man I barely knew surrounded by the people he loved and who loved him. His daughter gave a beautiful speech about who he was, who he became, how he accomplished all the things he wanted in life, from marrying the person he loved and having 3 beautiful daughters to having the career he wanted to living a life where he mended all the regrets he may have had before he passed.

I sit and wonder sometimes how life is passing us by so quickly. The older we get the faster it seems to go. Some people in life wait to do things in life not realizing that tomorrow is not promised. We wait to have the perfect career and enough money to support a family before having a family. We make mistakes and we don’t mend them with the people we said we loved. We hold anger and regret and we hold it inside until there is nothing left. We can not wait for a part of our lives to be perfect before making the next step into your life come alive, because if you keep waiting you may never get that chance to move forward with the people you love. If tomorrow never came did you tell the people you love that you love them? Did you mend any wrongs you made in life? Did you tell your friends how much you care? Are you where you want to be?

Life is too shorts to worry about the what if’s and I wish but life is something we treasure anyway. We live a life to get where we want to be, but stop for a second and take a few minutes to evaluate your life, think about the things you want in your future and ask yourself, can I HAVE THIS NOW? Why not now? If it’s there and I can grab it, then why not go for it? Tomorrow is never promised, if you keep waiting it may no longer be there for you to grab. Love, Live, Laugh (right) because if tomorrow came and you never told the person you loved that you love them, how would you feel then?

If you are reading this and you are my family, I love you. If you are reading this and you are my friends, I love you. If you are the person I want to spend my life with and you are reading this, I love you. If you are reading this and you know me but we haven’t spoken in a long time, I’m sorry. If you love me tell me, if you love me hug me, if you love me kiss me, if you love me….

xo,
kristin nicole

~Random Thoughts~

Random Thoughts:

Sometimes in life, life brings you unexpected news, or events in life that you never thought would happen. I sometimes wonder why things happen and I try to see that each event is only a lesson to be learned, but when that lesson involves someone dieing, what is the lesson in that? Perhaps it is not a lesson but a journey we have to go through to live and learn from. I rather not live through these times, I rather not know what it is to lose someone and I rather just forget what it felt like to love them. Wouldn’t it be so much easier if the pain we felt just disappeared with any memories of that person or pet or loved one? “Missing someone or something is sadness”. (kristin nicole)

Each time you lose someone you almost lose a piece of yourself. If I were to count all the pieces I’ve lost, what’s left? Each time a sad moment pops up into your mind try to distract yourself, try to think of something positive something that makes you happy. As a human we tend to have more negative thoughts than positive ones, because it is easier for us to see ourselves fail than to see ourselves actually succeed. Why is that? Why do we think so negatively and why do we lose faith in life?

Once upon a time, I lost faith, I lost hope, I lost love and I lost myself. Growing up I can not say I didn’t feel love, I can not say that I didn’t have love, family, or friends, but I can say that at one point in my life when things got hard I lost myself, and when I lost myself I lost faith and hope. I almost forgot what it was to be happy, to feel true love. When life gives you hardship, there is always a way out, there is always hope and there is always something out there better for you, you just have to believe. I believed that this was it, that what I felt was all there was, then for that one second I stood in my room and I closed my eyes, tears fell, and I realized that this can’t be it. If this was it, then why am I here, there has to be more than just ‘THIS’? There is always more, I have talked to people who have gone through worse things than I have, and I have read stories about people who have struggled all their lives, and that’s when you have to sit back for a moment and realize that maybe, just maybe the life you are living isn’t that bad.

I have lost, I have gained, I have laughed and I have cried, but with all that, I have lived.

Each part of me that you know is a part of me that loves, a part of me that wants only better, the part of me that has changed has been from life, and each of us has changed and grown from our experiences. You may not look at it the same way I do, but I promise you that there will always be at least one moment in your life that you will always remember, that one moment in life that you stop and say “THIS IS IT”….

xo
kristin nicole

The Question:

Parents what would you do if your son, and daughter had sex? Just wondering?
I know a friend of mine who had sex with her brother she told me, and I want to know if I were to tell, what parents would do in general in that kind of situation?

My response:

Dear Teen with a big secret;

I am not a parent but I am an older sister to my 16 year old sister. It is a scary thought that your kids may be having sex and to find out that they are I couldn’t imagine. BUT…. Yes…But…..it is going to happen one day. I don’t agree with having sex at such a young age and I do think that you really need to think about it before doing it. Most boys just want to have sex and nothing more, and the minute the girl gives it up the boy is gone. I know this happened to a lot of my friends in high school. If you are a parent that just found out your son or daughter is having sex or had sex, the only thing you can do is try to NOT to overreact. Try to talk to them about all the consequences, like diseases and about teen pregnancy. If you have a boy buy him condemns and explain to him about all the things that can happen along with respecting girls. If you have a girl, I think it is a lot harder, you can either get her on birth-control (Most parents think this is just giving the OKAY to have sex) but it’s better than the alternative…(Pregnancy), and you need to talk to her and explain all the the bad stuff that can come with having sex at such a young age. In the situation that your friend had sex with her own brother, that is just plain WRONG! That is incest and it can be that the brother raped her or molested her. If she had sex with her own brother willingly, that is wrong on all levels and either way they need help. In that situation I am not sure what the parents would do, they need to talk to both of them and find out exactly what happened and why. They will then need to have a lot of counseling. This is not normal and I hope your friend knows this. I hope she can get the help she needs and I hope her parents are strong enough to deal with something like this. Good luck….

xo,
kristin nicole

I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

The Question:

I’m 15 years old thinking of killing myself because my ex broke up with me, advice? We were really really good friends and I made the move of telling him that I liked him (which I think was a mistake!) he said he wanted to be with me forever and I wanted to be with him forever! I still do. He broke up with me, and I cried like crazy! Then I see him at school and he was being really nice to me and he asked me to get back with him and he apologized and said it would never happen again . Well he did it again that same week, and that just really hurt me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now I think of him everyday! I just really need love! I feel so empty!! I JUST WANT TO ****** DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please help….

My Response:

Dear Sadness;

Your first love is the hardest to ever get over. I remember the first time my heart broke, it felt like a glass shattering into a million pieces, I felt like I would never feel happy again, like my world was crashing down on me and there was no where to run. Once you stop for a second and you really think about how your relationship was, if he every truly cared about you to do something like this, you start to realize that maybe things just weren’t meant to be. I am not saying the pain will just go away, but you are only 15. At 15 we feel like our world will fall apart because that boy doesn’t love us anymore, but the truth is, our world stays in intact, our world keeps moving and eventually so do we. You have to be strong, and maybe you should talk to him and ask him why he keeps breaking up with you? Sometimes boys, especially at that age, do not know how to express themselves as well as we would like them to, but ask him anyway, why he is breaking up with you. At least this way you can at least have piece of mind and move on. You deserve better but a true friend, a person who truly loves you wouldn’t hurt you. You are still so very young, and trust me there are so many other boys out there for you. You might get hurt again and you may hurt a boys heart one day, but that is part of life, that is what makes us who we are and that is what makes us stronger to live our lives. Don’t ever feel like you want to die for a man, trust me they aren’t worth it. Love is beautiful and when you find that right love you will know it’s there forever. Stay strong, hang out with your friends and get your mind off him, but know that you are better than that and dieing will only cause more pain to your family and friends that love you so very much. Dieing is only an easy way out of not feeling pain, we all have to feel pain so that we can become better and make the same mistakes of the past. Have confidence in yourself and self respect to not go back out with him. Ever heard that saying “Hurt me once shame on you, hurt me twice shame on Me”. It’s true, you have the power to decide, you have the power to move on and find someone who will respect you and love you for you.

Remember life is hard, but I promise, it doesn’t always feel that way.

xo
kristin nicole

I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

Memorial Weekend 2010

Memorial Day: Memorial Day is a United States federal holiday observed on the last Monday of May. Formerly known as Decoration Day, it commemorates U.S. men and women who died while in the military service. First enacted to honor Union soldiers of the American Civil War (it is celebrated near the day of reunification after the Civil War), it was expanded after World War I.

Any Plans?!?

Any plans set up for Memorial weekend? Any good ideas you want to share? Let me know, recipes and more, I would love to see them and share them with others.

In Miami people usually head to the beach, BBQ, eat and drink, which is pretty much any other weekend in MIAMI

My plans:

We have two parties to attend actually. My cousins boyfriends house in Ft. Lauderdale, with a pool, catered food, and drinks, what more can you ask for. That will start around 12pm and around 4pm we will be heading out to our friends house in Cutler Bay, where we will then continue to party in the pool, eat and drink some more, may not sound like all crazy fun to you, but you do not know the people we hang out with. I can not wait!!

Some people make a whole trip out of it, maybe perhaps to go up to the Keys for the whole weekend, or somewhere else to have some fun. This year, I’m staying in….except for Sunday of course, which is when we are celebrating Memorial Day.

Tell me all about your plans I would love to hear them!!!

MEMORIAL DAY – some people do not really realize what it meant, which I left a small description in the beginning. I found this poem that I would love to share with you all.

Memorial Day

As we stand here looking
At the flags upon these graves
Know these flags represent
A few of the true American brave

They fought for their Country
As man has through all of time
Except that these soldiers lying here
Fought for your country and mine

As we all are gathered here
To pay them our respect
Let’s pass this word to others
It’s what they would expect

I’m sure that they would do it
If it were me or you
To show we did not die in vein
But for the red, white and blue.

Let’s pass on to our children
And to those who never knew
What these soldiers died for
It’s the least we can do

Let’s not forget their families
Great pain they had to bear
Losing a son, father or husband
They need to know we still care

No matter which war was fought
On the day that they died
I stand here looking at these flags
Filled with American pride.

So as the bugler plays out Taps
With its sweet and eerie sound
Pray for these soldiers lying here
In this sacred, hallowed ground.

Take home with you a sense of pride
You were here Memorial Day.
Celebrating the way Americans should
On this solemnest of days.

–© 1999 by Michelle Keim,
Commander of Royersford VFW Post 6341 in PA.–

You can see the poem Here

xo,
kristin nicole

The Question:

I want to know if I should change the way I am. If I’m honest I’m the loner girl who sits in the library and reads a book at lunch/break. The smart person people tend to feel sorry for. I hate people thinking that all I do is read and do “smart” things mainly because I’m not smart. With close friends I’ve known for ages I’m “Normal” but according to my best friend I’m a bit of a “Vixen” so what I want to know is, if I should start being the flirty jokey happy person I am out of school, in school?

My Response:

Dear Books;

Never change who you are for other people. Be happy with who you are and real friends will like YOU for you. However, you said that with your friends that you grew up with you are “normal”, I think wanting to read a book is normal, perhaps not all the kids do it, but it doesn’t mean you aren’t “normal”. You also said with your friends you are a flirty jokey happy person, if this is who you really are with people you feel comfortable with then you should feel comfortable to be like that everywhere and with everyone. Don’t hide who you are of fear of rejection. In life people will like you and some people won’t, this doesn’t mean that you aren’t normal or that you are different, it just means everyone has their own opinion and you don’t need to hang out with people who will judge you anyway. Be you, and you’ll see in the future, being you is GOOD!

xo,
kristin nicole

I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

The Question:

My sister went and got Power of Attorney behind my back, I am the next of kin, is there anything I can do? Mom now lives in care home/ nursing home and my sister is stopping me from taking mom out. She said she has power of attorney, dose that give her the rights to stop me?

My Response:

Dear Next of Kin;

Are you and your sister not talking, not communicating about the way you feel? You need to talk to her and see why she has taken out a power of attorney on your mother, and why she feels she needs to control this situation. (I am not sure where you live and the laws everywhere are different) I am not sure exactly if she has 100% of the “power” so to speak here with this power of attorney, but if you were the next of kin, was this stated somewhere in legal forms/ a living will? If it wasn’t, you might not have a say in this, but if you were then you can definitely fight back with a lawyer. Either way, I would get a lawyer involved and see what you can do to stop her from having control. Of course take into consideration that if you do or did have a good relationship with your sister getting a lawyer to fight back may cause more issues. Of course your sister went behind your back and got a power of attorney so she really is no one to talk. Find yourself a lawyer if you can and take back control of the situation. If you don’t want to get a lawyer involved try talking to your sister, find out why she felt the need to go behind your back, instead of just talking to you and figuring things out together. If your mom is really sick this isn’t the time to push away the family you have left. Good luck.

xo,
kristin nicole

I found this question off Answers.Yahoo.com

The Question:

How can i help my friend her son ran away three days ago and she thinks something bad happened? He is her baby he is 14 and ran away three days ago and the police are involved now but i am unsure how to help her and her husband i want to just really unsure. Been there almost every day supporting her it just doesn’t seem enough i guess. Advice?

My Response:

Dear Good Friend;

Just being there for her during this hard time is the only thing you can do. Letting her know you are there for her is good. This isn’t something that you can just fix. Her son is obviously troubled if he ran away from home. If the police are involved I am assuming they have filed a missing person report (this is the first step into finding him). A lot of people think that just because a teenager runs away from home they can’t file a missing person report and this is their first mistake, he is still a minor and they can file a missing person report in hopes that if someone spots him the police can pick him up. Three days must feel like a decade to your friend and her family, and I couldn’t imagine the thoughts that are going through your friends head. Just keep doing what you have been doing and be there for your friend, other than that, there really isn’t much more you can do. If you want to help other than moral support, you can try posting pictures of him around the neighborhood, gather some people from the neighborhood to help. Even though he ran away from home, doesn’t mean something hasn’t happened, and doesn’t mean you can’t go about it as if he was missing or taken. I hope he comes back home soon and my prayers are with your friends family. Keep praying and don’t give up hope.

xo,
kristin nicole

I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

The Question:

I feel like I can talk to him better than my husband. When I try to talk to my hubby he just doesn’t listen. His friend listens to me and tells me his opinion on things, and no he is not trying to get me in his bed. This guy is not like that. What is your opinions on this subject?

My Response:

Dear confidant;

It’s a tough call, the guy is your husbands friend so it may be a little awkward for your husband if he knows that you are going to his friend for advice. You really should be able to talk to your husband, he should be your confidant (your best friend, go to guy), and if he can’t sit down and talk to you, then you need to make sure to get his attention and tell him how you feel. Explain to him that you want to talk to him and you feel like he doesn’t listen. If he still doesn’t listen then it’s his own fault for pushing you towards his friend, I just hope what you are saying is true and this Friend isn’t “that type of guy”, unfortunately as a women we believe that, and we truly think these guys are only our friends, but unfortunately guys think way differently than we do and sometimes emotions may change, so be careful, I also hope that you truly just see it as a friendship and nothing more. Remember you are married, if you really love your husband talk to him, and try to make him understand what you are feeling. Good Luck.

xo,
kristin nicole

I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

The Question:

I’m 27 weeks pregnant, living with my boyfriend. He hasn’t done really anything through my pregnancy, so far (like getting a job). His plans were to stop smoking weed this summer and join the navy, because the benefits are good! He’ll get health and dental insurance and they’ll pay his way through college, and our son will get those health benefits, as well. That’s what was most important to me, because I’ll be going off to college within the next year and it’s going to be so hard for me to pay for hospital bills/medication (if something should happen to me or our son) while going to school. Those benefits for the baby would have eased a lot of stress. But NOW, he’s wanting just to go to college. I asked why he changed his mind and he said because he doesn’t want to stop smoking weed. I support any decision he makes to further his education, because that’s better than nothing, but I think that’s selfish on his part. I had to exchange my career dreams for a career that I’m not completely interested in, but can support our family, but he can’t put down the pot? It’s not only that, but he’s trying to go to college in COLORADO. We live in Texas and the thought of him being so far away from us tears me apart.

Question is: Should I support his dreams fully and be positive that everything will turn out okay? OR Is this really something to talk/argue about with him?

My response:

Dear going to be a mom;

You are pregnant and you are about to start a family. Just because you are pregnant doesn’t mean you need to marry the father of your baby, especially if the relationship isn’t so good. The Navy is a big commitment, I wouldn’t push him into going into the Navy just because it has good benefits and health plans, entering into any Government force is a big commitment and in the Navy you would barely see your husband either because they go out to sea a lot of the times, however if it is something he does like and was considering then I do believe he needs to wake up and grow up and realize that he’s having a baby soon. If his plans are to go to college in another state why isn’t he inviting you to go with him? You don’t leave your family behind for college, you take them with you. I’m sorry but it seems to me like he is trying to run away from his responsibilities, and he needs to grow up and realize that he’s going to be a Dad soon, if he wasn’t ready to give up smoking weed to get a job and support his family then he should had thought about all that before getting you pregnant. You have to confront him, this isn’t something you just let go, Don’t push him into the Navy, but he definitely needs to get a Job and he needs to stay close to his family, if he doesn’t want that then you need to make a choice, you need to decide if this is the life you want, is this the person you want to spend the rest of your life with? If the college in Colorado is really what he wants, don’t stop him from going, but there are ways to still be together, you can move over there with him and be a family. As for the weed, he definitely needs to just give that up! However, with all that said, just because he’s the father doesn’t mean you have to stay with him. As for you going to college, don’t give up what you wanted to study, there are many plans the government can help you with especially for a single mother going to school, many grants and other things. Look into it, but don’t give up. You got yourself in this position so now you also have to grow up and take responsibility, don’t rely on a man to get you where you want to be. I hope it works out for you because it’s nice to have that perfect little family (but sometimes it doesn’t always work that way) so if it doesn’t work out that way, you need to be strong for your child, move on, get a job and continue school. But definitely TALK ABOUT IT!

xo,
kristin nicole

I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com