Tag Archives: family

I’m too involved in my daughters life and it’s taking me away from my son and husband

Posted on by
Reply

Over Involved Mother – image by: google.com/images

The Question:

 Dear Kristin Nicole;

I am way too involved in my nearly 15 year old daughter’s life. It consumes me and my happiness seems to be dependent on how happy she is. I find myself getting too involved in social issues and give advice often before she asks for it. We have a great relationship and she tells me so much but I sometimes wish she didn’t. Lately I have lost sleep worrying about girl issues and boyfriend issues. She is extremely attractive and athletic and often suffers from jealous girls trying to knock her down. Lately these girls have been trying to turn boys against her and have succeeded to a point. She says it doesn’t worry her but I struggle to believe that. She says she is fine but I just can’t stop worrying and giving advice. I need to stop before I ruin the wonderful relationship we have had and she stops telling me things. It’s just that I know what can potentially happen and I am trying to protect her from it. Help me to stop as i am neglecting my 11 year old son and husband that is all that is consuming my thoughts. I am an educated person with a degree so I should know better! (Edited by: KN)

My Response:

Dear Over involved mom;

I know it’s hard to not worry about your daughter, but you have already passed the first step of realizing you are too involved. You have to accept that your daughter needs to make her own mistakes and you need to try to let what she tells you not bother you. If your daughter is open with you and she is telling you that she is okay, you need to believe her and let her come to you if things aren’t okay. Start making time for mother and son day. I can only imagine that things in common with an 11 year old son may be difficult but try to see what he wants to do and start giving him attention as well. Also try to make time for a date night with your husband and talk to him about how you are feeling. If you don’t explain to him how you feel then he won’t understand what it is you are going through. If you talk to him then at least he will have a better understanding on what is going on with you. Remember communication is key, let him help you and get your mind off things. Remember teenagers will have ups and downs, that’s why it’s called teenage years, so try not to worry so much about your daughter. It sounds to me like she’s a smart girl, and she already knows she can come to you if she needs you. Start focusing on the good and don’t over analyze everything she tells you.
Good Luck
xo,
kristin nicole

RIP Luis Ceballos – An Angel was taken

Posted on by
Reply

RIP Luis

In life we don’t know how we will die, or when we will die, but for others we are prepared and given no choice but to be taken from our family. Cancer is something not many people plan for, it isn’t something we can every truly understand, and no matter how hard we fight, sometimes Cancer defeats us, and with that God has taken a man that has touched so many. I only met Luis about two times, and in those two times you can tell he was an incredible man. This man meant so much to so many people. He walked into the life of my friends mom, she finally found the love her life and it saddens me to know she has lost him to the battle of cancer.

A man who touched so many lives was lost yesterday, he has left behind a wife, and children and step children, grandchildren, family and friends. Luis had a journal in which he wrote how he felt, his last entry was on Father’s Day of 2012. You can see his journal entries here: http://lceballos61.livejournal.com/. If you truly want to meet a strong man, I recommend you read his journal. He is an inspiration to us all.

Whenever you feel like your life isn’t going the way you expected, stop and be grateful for what you do have in your life. Luis taught us to stop and smell the flowers no matter how hard life hits you. He taught many never to give up and to live life to the fullest. I only hope that his family can take on his strength and that they will one day feel peace in their hearts. Today we mourn a man who was strong, a man who thought more about his own family than any other man I have ever met, and today I give thanks for knowing him, even if it was only for a short time. I give thanks to god for letting his wife and my friends have them in their lives and to love such a wonderful man. I am sorry they had to lose him to cancer and I will pray that they will get through this hard time.

I love you all and my prayers are with you. Today God took not only an incredible man, but an angel. Rest In Peace Luis, we will all miss you.

xo,

kristin nicole

I know…

Posted on by
Reply

I know... image by: google.com/images

I know

I know what it feels like
I know what it takes
I know deep inside you feel lost
A wall you have built
To let everyone out
Hoping that will make things better
Losing yourself within the doubt

When things start looking better
You sabotage your own results
Living a lie not in pleasure
You cry in bed at all costs

I know how you feel
I was there too
Not knowing who you are
Pretending to be two

Living in the dark
Not knowing where to go
Living a lie of happiness
When all you feel is alone

You don’t have to cry
You don’t have to feel alone
You don’t need to defy all the odds
You have to just let go

Let go of the sadness, of the anger and tears
Look deep inside yourself
And get rid of all your fears

Deep down there is a way
Even though you may not see
But everyone at one point feels alone
You just have to wake up and see
That although you do not want to hear it, see it or believe it
Family is always there
Because we care.

Take a moment to see who you are
Know that in the end you will go far
You have to have faith and see what we see
Because deep down inside you want to be free,
And the only way to do that is to be honest with yourself
remember that in the end, you can only change yourself.

xo
kristin nicole

© Written by: Kristin Nicole – August 2012

Wonder

Posted on by
Reply

Wonder - Images by: google.com/images


Wonder

Why do you shut out those that you love?
Why do you lay there pretending you are the only one?
Why can’t you see you’re going to be all alone?
You’ve pushed us away for so long
We are practically out the door.

She loved you but you couldn’t see
All the things she meant to be
With every day the heart grows fonder
In this case, the days grew quieter

With every rain drop tears fell at night
Holding in the anger that made everything alright
Now it’s in the open a relationship that barely exists
Separate lives, one house, not a home
But a reminder of what isn’t there anymore.

We hope and we pray that everything will be alright
Scared to move forward
Staying in something that isn’t right
Pretending everything is okay
Is killing the way I feel
Wondering if love is even real.

Does it always go away?
Or does true love really exist?
Two people, one world, one love
In the end does it all even matter?
Or do we keep moving forward
Pretending that life is going to be okay
Scared to move on
Scared of the world
Scared to be alone
Living in a lie that will never be home.

© Written by: kristin nicole 2012

Little Black Box

Posted on by
Reply

Little black box

When you left I put you in a box
wrapped you up and left you in the back of my head
Every now and then you pop up in my mind
leave me alone
it just isn’t our time

You left me so sudden
it all just went away
I didn’t have time to cry for you
so I walked away.

Everyone leaves one day
but it just wasn’t your time
that day in the hospital
a part of me died.
Every time someone left a part of me left too
it’s a wonder I’m still here
standing here
writing this to you.

With tears held back
I shiver in fear
because I don’t know who I’ll lose next
and drown out my tears

The world is so big
yet oh so small
why can’t you just leave when you leave
why do you linger in my dreams?

Letting go of pain
is the hardest thing I’ve had to do
Living in this world of mine
I do what I have to do

Today is another day
Today I continue to walk
Today I live my life
with you in that little black box.

© ~written by: kristin nicole – March 16, 2011

xo,
kristin nicole

Did you ever think of me?!?

Posted on by
3

Did You Ever Think Of ME?

Did you ever stop and think of me
Or did you just pretend I never existed?
Closed that door
made a lie about how you never loved me anymore
Left me standing there with my heart on my sleeve
wondering what I did wrong
Wondering how I can fix something that didn’t exist.

I wrote you a letter
you never wrote back
later i found out you held it in your sack.
Why didn’t you say anything to me
why did you hide who you were
don’t you know i would have loved you anyway

Standing there all alone
I cried
Wondering why you couldn’t love me
And with tears in my eyes I pulled out that paper and pen
started to write all the things you didn’t want to feel
But I told you the truth
and the truth always hurts
look in the mirror and see who you are
stop hiding
I’m right here.

No words can express the pain you caused me
I think that’s when I started shutting people out
I started to hide behind a wall
because behind the wall no one can see
all the pain you truly caused me.

I pulled out that paper and pen
started to write all the things you didn’t want to hear
But I told you the truth
and the truth always hurts
look in the mirror and see who you are
stop hiding
I’m right here.

Now it’s too late
you’re already gone
Why couldn’t you see the truth
that no matter who you were
I would always love you.
Why couldn’t you stop hiding?
I was right here…

© written by: kristin nicole – February 19, 2010 – Friday

~ This was written about someone that used to be in my life. They passed away without ever being able to talk things out. Life is too short, when you feel something let the person you love know because you never know when they’ll be gone. If I haven’t said it enough, I love you!~

xo,
kristin nicole

Is my Uncle cheating on my Auntie?

Posted on by
Reply

The Question:

Is my Uncle cheating on my Auntie?

I was playing hide and seek with my cousin and hiding behind a sofa when my uncle came to sit down not knowing I was there. He got out his phone and started texting someone. I could only see a little bit of the text and I saw words such as GIRLFRIEND and GORGEOUS. When my cousin suddenly walked in the room he quickly hid his phone. HELP. What should I do?

Additional Details
I’m 14 and was made to play hide and seek with my 4 year old cousin by parents….

My Response:

Dear Hide & Seek;

This is a hard position to be in, but you don’t necessarily know he is cheating on your aunt, and you do not want to stir up problems if there really isn’t any. This is between your aunt and uncle and I would just leave it alone. If you feel that you can’t and it is really bothering you then talk to your parents about what you saw, then let them take it from there. You are too young to be worrying about stuff like this… Good luck

xo,
kristin nicole

I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

Inspiration

Posted on by
1

This week…

So this week I didn’t have many Advice columns, I was inspired to write from the heart, write about life and questions that we sometimes have. I have come across a few people in my life, friends that have come and gone, boyfriends, and family and I know so many people who have the same questions. Sometimes we think we are alone in what we feel, we feel like no one can ever understand us. In some cases no one will know 100% of what you feel because everyone goes through life differently and everyone reacts differently to situations, but just because you go through it differently doesn’t mean another person can’t understand what you are going through.

Life is a road we all must take, and although we don’t know where it is going, we drive on it anyway, hoping it leads us to that happy ending in the sky….

Inspiration:

In life I have met people who have inspired me to become a better person, inspired me to fight for what I want and inspired me that no matter what you may think about yourself or what others may think of you, in the end you will find your way….
Life has brought a lot of negative things but it’s also brought a lot of positive, loving things. If we dwell on the negative that has happened to us then we will never be able to truly move forward, we will never be able to truly feel the happiness that is out there waiting for us. I can’t say I haven’t held grudges or that I’m perfect, and I am not saying it’s easy to forgive someone that has hurt you, but if we can’t change the past, we can’t change what happened to us then we need to learn how to move on from it. We need to learn that the past stays in the past and our future has so many more possibilities filled with love and happiness. I have to believe that there is more out there for me, just like I know there is more out there for you (the person reading this). Each day I get closer to my dreams coming true.

Today I am inspired to become a better person
Today I am inspired to make my dreams come true
Today I am inspired to believe in the unbelievable
Today I am inspired to Love
Today I am inspired to take in the cool air and imagine the possibilities
Today I am just inspired…..

xo,
kristin nicole

© kristin nicole

Happy Birthday Mom

Posted on by
3

Have you ever had a best friend in your life? A friend that isn’t just your friend but your mom? That’s how I feel about my mom…. If I have a problem with anything I know I can always count on her, I can only hope to be a great mother one day, the way she has been to me and my brother and sister.

I want to dedicate this poem to my mom… Happy Birthday Mom, I hope you are having a wonderful day; today and many more years to come.

Today Is your Day…

Today is the day I thank God
Not only for making you my mother
But for making you my Best Friend.

Today is the day I thank God
For having you in my life.
When I needed you the most you were always there for me.
When I thought my heart was breaking you cried with me.
When I thought I wasn’t good enough, you encouraged me.
When I thought life was too hard, you showed me the way.
Without you in my life I would be lost
You showed me to be me, you love me for me and you accept every part of me.

You are not only my best friend, but my mother
And I am the luckiest daughter in the world to have a mother like you in my life.

Today I thank God
Because without you I would be lost.
Happy Birthday Mom! I love you!

xo,
kristin nicole

“A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials heavy and sudden, fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends who rejoice with us in our sunshine desert us; when trouble thickens around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts.” -Washington Irving

My friend had sex with her brother…

Posted on by
Reply

The Question:

Parents what would you do if your son, and daughter had sex? Just wondering?
I know a friend of mine who had sex with her brother she told me, and I want to know if I were to tell, what parents would do in general in that kind of situation?

My response:

Dear Teen with a big secret;

I am not a parent but I am an older sister to my 16 year old sister. It is a scary thought that your kids may be having sex and to find out that they are I couldn’t imagine. BUT…. Yes…But…..it is going to happen one day. I don’t agree with having sex at such a young age and I do think that you really need to think about it before doing it. Most boys just want to have sex and nothing more, and the minute the girl gives it up the boy is gone. I know this happened to a lot of my friends in high school. If you are a parent that just found out your son or daughter is having sex or had sex, the only thing you can do is try to NOT to overreact. Try to talk to them about all the consequences, like diseases and about teen pregnancy. If you have a boy buy him condemns and explain to him about all the things that can happen along with respecting girls. If you have a girl, I think it is a lot harder, you can either get her on birth-control (Most parents think this is just giving the OKAY to have sex) but it’s better than the alternative…(Pregnancy), and you need to talk to her and explain all the the bad stuff that can come with having sex at such a young age. In the situation that your friend had sex with her own brother, that is just plain WRONG! That is incest and it can be that the brother raped her or molested her. If she had sex with her own brother willingly, that is wrong on all levels and either way they need help. In that situation I am not sure what the parents would do, they need to talk to both of them and find out exactly what happened and why. They will then need to have a lot of counseling. This is not normal and I hope your friend knows this. I hope she can get the help she needs and I hope her parents are strong enough to deal with something like this. Good luck….

xo,
kristin nicole

I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com